You Can't Lose

How to Make Good Clutter-Clearing and Donating Decisions

Giving things away is really hard for most of us.

We fear that we will regret our decisions. Possessions often are tangible reminders of our pasts. Just having them, we may feel, is a measure of the value of our lives. Even when painful to face old possessions, and you want to let go, the decision-making about how and when can stop you in your tracks.

But not letting go of our clutter can wreak havoc within families. Lack of time or cooperation also makes it difficult. The logistics of giving stuff away can be overwhelming. Where do you start? How do you sort? Who will take what? Who will value your belongings the way you hope they will? How do you record the value of your non-cash donations for a meager tax return when an object's value seems so much more in our heart of hearts? Take into account the time and the emotions entailed, and it seems easier to just throw things away and be done with it, or do nothing until you absolutely have to.

Seeing the larger picture of what gives things value and why we hold onto our stuff, understanding what clutter is and is not, and building a regular routine for donations all make letting go easier. It's possible to make decisions you won't regret. Getting help makes the process more comfortable, and yes, even fun. And knowing how to work with charities can ease any after pangs.

Holding onto stuff gets in our way on emotional and physical levels, costing our psyches a great deal of wear and tear. When you clear out the things you no longer love or use, you literally feel better and make room for what you want in your present life.

Holding on has less to do with the value of the object itself than the fear that resources will not be available to meet your future needs. By making good decisions in the present (rather than worrying about a fabricated future), you automatically become better prepared for your future, a future that will unfold more favorably than you can imagine if you take better care of your present.

It's okay to throw things out when they are beyond repair or usefulness, but it's important not to discard too soon. Yes, it is true that it is often cheaper to replace something than repair it. Yes, it is true that our current market makes things obsolete so that you will want or need to purchase the newer version. Yet, when we throw things away too soon, before the end of their actual usefulness, it's a premature burial. It's like burying something that is still alive.

Too many Americans literally cannot afford what you can afford to toss. By donating your viable goods, you contribute to everyone's well-being — yours, your family's, your community's, and the earth's. Give people a chance to use and even love your belongings while they are still "alive."

In truth, we never get rid of anything. What we do, instead, is move our stuff farther away from us — to family, to friends, to strangers, and ultimately to the final container, the earth. Just like your closets, the earth is already rather full, and cannot fit much more.

Many people have too much stuff, not because they are greedy or mentally ill, but because they haven't taken the time to adjust to the reality of their present life. Stuff just piles up. Moves, deaths, marriages, children, career changes, and new interests all require adjustment. Clearing our clutter is a way to adjust to the demands and desires of our present life. Just like our lives regularly change over the years, clearing clutter needs to be done regularly. By doing so, you get to have a more comfortable and productive life instead of all the stuff that's in your way.

To help you make good decisions and distinguish clutter from the rest of your belongings, ask yourself four questions while clearing out:

Do you love it now?
Do you use it now?
Does it fit into the integrity of your current home?
Does it fit your current lifestyle?

It's about telling the truth. If you truly love it, but don't use it, keep it, especially if you now have the space to store it after you clear your clutter. Be selective. Keep your favorites, and let go of the rest. Just because something was given to you, doesn't mean you have to keep it if you don't like it. Many decisions become obvious once you get going, and you'll notice there are only certain things you struggle over. Take your time, but persevere.

Each of us has a finite number of years in our lives, square footage in our homes, and activities we can dedicate our time to. Americans don't like limits; we would rather hold on, or even add on in order to make room for all our stuff (and avoid the decision-making). But we need to be selective of what fits into — and gives value to — our present life. If you are down-sizing or moving, for example, you have the perfect opportunity to stop being a non-paid storage bin for your adult children. Give your children a deadline to clear out their own stuff, and if unmet, give their stuff away. Before you move, clear clutter, and divide your objects of sentimental or monetary value among your children by asking them what they would want or use. Be fair, and let them participate in the negotiations.

When something is unloved or unused, it loses its value. Try not to take it personally. Styles and interests change, and a complete stranger may appreciate an object more than your family members. If it is in good shape or can reasonably be repaired, give it away before you throw it away — before your move. You not only reduce the cost of your move, but achieve the added bonus of knowing you will have room for what you love and use in your new home, and what does not come with you will be valued by someone else. There is no loss in letting go.

If you are moving in the spring, start clearing your clutter over the winter months. Your move will be a lot less stressful, and you'll save money because you will not be paying to move all that clutter to your next home (or the next or the next).

When you routinely clear clutter and make donations, the piles don't get bigger and you don't get overwhelmed. Make clearing and donating a family affair. Bring your kids to the charity so they can see the larger picture, learn to appreciate how much they do have, and realize that they can make a difference (giving, receiving, sharing wealth, community, and having fun together). Here's how:

Find an organization that works for a cause that you already care about (the homeless, children, health, gay rights, international assistance, etc.).
Pick a time that you can regularly donate once a month (or bimonthly) that fits your schedule and the organizations. (2nd Tuesday of month, for example).
Place a medium-size container in your home or car as a "holding station" for donations.
"Putter through your Clutter" 15 minutes a day, or once a week as a family activity, and put stuff in your family's "holding station."
Every family member over five years old gets involved. Use the four questions above to help them learn how to make decisions they won't regret.
If you are not sure about an item, put it in a separate box, wait a month and decide then for the next donation trip.

For larger clutter-clearing projects, work no more than four hours at a time. Any longer may drain you of energy, pleasure, and motivation.

If you clear your clutter in little bits over the months, it never gets the best of you. And the lugging and transporting to a favorite, local charity is just a monthly errand instead of a resented weekend event.

Another way to make it easier, even fun, is to build a ClutterClarity Community by enlisting your like-minded friends and neighbors. Together you can clear big items, be resourceful regarding vehicles, and get help lifting and loading on the specific day when donations are accepted and you may not be available. Rotate responsibilities over the months, and donating becomes even easier. Celebrate with a pot-luck dinner.

Donating can be difficult. The logistics can kill all good intentions. Either you don't have enough muscle, the right size vehicle, or the organization is not open the day or time that you are free, or won't even take what you have to give. I spoke with Bill Perkins of Boston Restore, Inc. and here are some ways to minimize the hassle.

Call ahead each time you donate. Procedures, drop-off times, and locations often change.
Schedule two-three weeks in advance with organizations that will pick-up donations.
Donate in the middle of the month when an organization's storage space is more open.
Send the organization a digital picture of larger items (furniture, building materials, etc.) for an A-OK before you do any heavy lifting.
Recognize that the charity has veto power based on:
1. Size of and how full its storage facility is at any given time
2. Quantity of items already in storage
3. Cost to repair item
4. Current need for item
5. Change in organization's policies or mission statement
6. Different understanding of "great stuff"

When using plastic trash bags, fill bags only 1/2 or 3/4 full to make lifting easier for everyone. Use white plastic bags for donations and black bags for trash to create visual clarity as you work. Put like items together and label the boxes and bags. For example: women's sweaters, size large. The organization will really appreciate this courtesy.

For some people, it is enough to just feel better by clearing their home of clutter and giving it to someone who may need or appreciate it. Others can not be bothered to record non-cash contributions because they feel that determining the donations' value is too complicated, or that the tax deduction is not worth the effort. Only you (and your accountant) know if getting donation receipts is worth the effort based on your individual life and finances.

A few charities will mail you a receipt or letter after they have assessed the value of your donations. Most give you a form or letter as proof that they received your donation, and it is up to you to set the value.

To help determine the value of your non-cash donations, go to www.salvationarmy.com. It is relatively easy to find your way through the posted government documents. Click on "Your Help, Donate, Receipts" and you will find:

Valuation Guide (low and high values organized by appliances, children's items, dry goods, furniture, women's items, men's items)
Charitable Contributions (IRS document)
Determining the Value of Donated Property (IRS document)
Non-Cash Contributions 8283 tax form

By making good decisions on a regular basis, you can't lose by giving away what you no longer love or use. Building a ClutterClarity Routine creates an unburdened lifestyle, a life more full of peace of mind than stuff, which is what most of us really want, yet have in short supply. Remember, give it away, rather than throw it away too soon. By doing so, you help create a future prosperity for you, your family, and your community. Importantly, you will have the space you need for your present desires, including new people, events and activities that will enrich your life. Your future will unfold as it will, yet you will be better prepared to adapt and embrace it.

Laura Moore, M.Ed., principal of ClutterClarity, helps people unburden their lives and homes of clutter through on-site clutter clearing, making donations easier, coaching, and teaching workshops on the Culture of Clutter.

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